Crystal Ball

With three weeks to go until election day, I don’t think anyone can honestly say they don’t know exactly what’s going to happen. If you think Trump has even a slim chance of winning, you must be snorting cocaine from his debate stash. Here’s how it’s going to go down:

1) Hillary will be elected with a comfortable margin. It won’t even be close

2) Within the first 100 days, she’ll gets us involved in 1-3 wars. Russia’s first, soon followed by Syria, and probably Iran

3) By 2018, ol’ grandma will keel over in the Oval Office and we’ll get stuck with Tim Kaine — America’s creepy pedophile uncle

Enjoy these last few days of freedom, friends. The long and storied history of this great country ends on Hillary’s inauguration day.

by Eugene Pierfekt
Gaseoustania Tonight


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