Dare Me, Bro!

Michael Phelps plans to race a shark as part of a “Shark Week” promotion. I can’t wait to see how Discovery Channel rigs things in his favor.

There is no way this douche could beat a shark without outside intervention. Which means they’ll use any tactic possible to make sure he “wins.”

Wishful thinking
  • sedate the shark
  • get a nurse or baby shark
  • give Phelps some sort of hidden swim aid
  • call the whole thing off at the last minute and blame “technical difficulties”

In any event (and with any luck) the shark will eat him, and we won’t have to hear about this dirtbag druggie anymore.

by Danka Leebon
Gaseoustania Tonight


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